Scales belong on fish

I often talk about work-life balance here on my blog and that is possibly because it is something that is new to me and I am still trying to figure it all out.

Since returning to my profession in a part time capacity I have noticed that I do not feel any different to how I felt when I worked full time. In fact, I feel as though I am better at my job - I am far more organised and make a point of being a good communicator to my colleagues to ensure that any problems which may occur on a day when I am not there are able to be dealt with. However, in recent weeks I have had the feeling that my contribution is valued less because I am  part time. I feel as though I am given less challenging work and that my workload is vetoed more stringently to ensure that I can 'manage' the load. While I am sure that in some cases this is necessary, I feel that I am being held back ever so slightly.

I am the first to admit that our pregnancy was not well timed. I was most definitely not where I had planned for my carrer to be when I fell pregnant. In fact, I was three weeks into a brand new  job and it was quite literally the worst timing that was possible. Like many things that we don't think we will get through - I got through it. I came out the other side and I am OK, but I don't think my career progression is. Now I feel like I am paddling through mud and feel as though unless I go back full time, I may well be paddling through mud for years to come. Especially considering I am planning on having more children.

At this point dear reader you might be thinking - so what - what does it matter if you are going to have more children? Work will just become less and less important to you - right? Possibly - yes. However I am pretty sure that as long as I need to go there each day, I am going to want to be stimulated and challenged during the hours that I am there. You see - I am not someone who can just go, do a job and then come home again. I like to get involved, make a difference and be really fulfilled in all aspects of my life. My brain cannot sit idle for too long...the ticking starts to annoy me after a while.

Is it too much to ask to be given opportunities to do exactly the same work as you would do if you where there 5 days per week when you are only there 3? I don't think so - I know I am certainly capable of it. I do think it is a form of mild discrimination.

I must admit that I do have it very good. I have a very good employer and have been granted to blessing of being able to continue to breastfeed my child during working hours (He attends childcare onsite) and am not disadvantaged in any other way because I work part time. However, it is this small  aspect of capability that irritates me and leaves me wanting to leave altogether. Why should I be valued less because I choose to do a little for me (Work in my chosen field) and also be a mother?

I have noticed this topic of work life balance come up in a number of different forums in the past few weeks and I was reminded of it by an article by my favourite journalist in her column this past weekend. She writes about the virtues of this post feminist world we live in and how the generation of young women encroaching on childbearing age have a path paved by their feminist predecessors which has given them the freedom of being able to "have it all". We have these wonderful employee poilicies that promote and allow work life balance and disallow discrimination on the grounds of being a woman. However, the path for true equality in terms of career progression without sacrifice on some part is still quite murky.  Is it really possible to take 12 months off work to spend with your child during a time when they are so vulnerable to attachment and then return part time and expect to still achieve those same things you had dreams of achieving before you had the baby? From my own person experience I think not. ( You can read the full article Here!)

An even more disturbing aspect of this reality was brought to my attention by Amy Tieman (Mojo Mom) in her podcast entitled "Mojo Mom and Paula Spencer of Momfidence and Caring.com" who talks about her experience of hearing that young university women had decided to not have children altogether because of the impact it wuold have on thier future career and the fact that the working world  is not very inviting and inclusive to working moms.

It is sad that young women are growing up in a world that values work more than the beauty and fulfillment of granting human life.

I agree in entirity that there needs to be balance between work and life. I also think that it is important for mom's who choose to work for their own sense of self are able to do so. But at what expense because it seems to me that something has to give.

For me - well it is time to reassses my work values because I know that I value my family and my child far more highly.

So off I go to work to simlply do my job and be happy while I am there - anything else that happens along the way is a bonus. My more important job and the one I need to invest more in is at home.

This post was written for the Steady Mom  Mom's 30 minnute blog Challenge.

Comments

[Leigh from 123 blog]

Oh hi, thanks for your comment on my blog about the night dread :)

I'm from South Africa, I see you're from Australia. I had an inkling when I saw your working 3 days a week thing because I've only ever heard of it working properly there LOL

I recently wrote about redefining success especially now that my twins are born. I would love to hear what you think.

http://leighloveslists.blogspot.com/2010/02/redefining-success.html

[Andrea]

Hi Leigh - yep definitely Australia. I didn't realise that part time work is not so easy in other countries. I am not even in a job sharing arrangement - I simply work 0.6 full time equivalent or 3 days per week. The three days i work are consecutive and I think that makes the continuity easier. That is part of the reason why I get frustrated at the quality of the work I am given to do because I feel as though I am there enough to manage it. Your post on success is good. I think that you do need to redefine what you consider to be personal succcess after you have had children - it is all about values and remembering what is most important.

[Kirstin]

I'm in the UK and work 2 days a week. I was going back to work full time throughout my pregnancy, I was the manager after all how could they cope without me but after giving birth completely changed my mind. I love the stimulation work brings but I don't think work have realised yet that I only work part time (my son is two and a half!) At work I have a to do list a mile long but I made a decision that work would not impact on my family life (I failed miserably at this in January but I am starting again this month and have done brilliantly) and nothing has fallen apart at work.

You need to put you at the center of your decisions and live intentionally. Yesterday I had a whole day planned out but when I asked my son if there was anything he wanted to do he said he wanted to be a pirate on a train - we had a fantastic time. I just keep thinking that soon he will not want to do these things with me, he will only be at home for 18 years at the most before he is off to university or travelling or just generally hates me because I won't allow him to do something. By then I will be 53 and probably be considered too old for the work place but I am living for now and something will turn up it usually does!

I hope you find some focus soon - your son looks delightful.

[Emily from ReadyToWait.com]

Andrea, The work-life balance thing gets more complicated when you have children. It just does. I appreciate your thoughts here; they resonate with me. I too feel like I get more done more quickly now that I am a mom and working part time. But I don't want to walk away when things aren't finished or aren't just so... even when walking away means going home to the most wonderful little blond-headed boy you can imagine.

I just pray that there are lessons for my whole family in my work--lessons about passion and commitment and calling. Hang in there.